My Favorite Reader Stops By For A Guest Spot!!

10 rules for NOT dating like a dufus
By: Krissy Chubbuck.

10. We appreciate that you love killing nazis and blowing up army guys in iraq while talking shit to your friends online… we don’t need a blow by blow description of it.

9. Double negatives are not your friend. Its one thing to play dumb. Its completely different to be dumb. Put down the controller and crack a book.

8. We understand, and have come to terms with the fact that you must look at every pair of tits that comes in your line of vision.You do not, however, need to VERBALIZE to us how wonderful they are. We don’t care. We get to stare at boobs every time we bathe.

7. A girl will always act independent like she doesn’t need you to do things for her, but inside she feels like a delicate flower when you are protective.

6. Its cute when youre jealous. Not like psycho, fear mark walhberg jealous. Just the “that dude just checked out your ass GRR” jealous.

5. Do not carry dirty talk from the bedroom into the real world. I don’t need to be grocery shopping with you pulling my hair and asking me to call you daddy.

4. Women have beautiful TIDY bodies. Everything is neat and in its place. Please do NOT shove your junk in our faces. Its not sexy. It looks like 2 apples in a shopping bag and we are all set. This is why chippendales dudes keep the speedos ON.

3. We ALWAYS care how we look. If you see a chick and shes an adorable mess, hair everywhere, all windblown, runny make-up, baggy clothes, you can almost bet that she still stood in front of a mirror for 20 mins.

2. It is NOT ok for you to be friends with your exes. It IS ok for us to be friends with ours. Hypocritical? Yes. But we as women know that we are not going to jump back into bed with some asshole that stole our bank card, slept with our cousin, and told our father to eat shit. You on the other hand, might.
(Editors note, you may not jump back in to bed with that asshole, but we definitelty don't want you to remain friends with an ex either!!! I couldn't resist making the 1 comment)

1. We like to talk. I know. It sucks. And we get all psycho if you don’t seem to be listening, even if its about some bitch at work that was acting like a whore. But If you could just, sometimes, pretend to care and hate her too, everything will be ok. =)